Collage 3
The Dawg-gone Blog
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Wednesday, April 13, 2005
Before I begin, I'd like to add Penny to my list. Penny is a cocker-spaniel owned by Candace McWhirter and Penny is also the only woman to ever snuggle me after just meeting me. Thanks Penny. :-D

Moving on...

A long time ago (I'd say about 5 years) I wrote something called "50 Things I Believe." I don't know why I did it or what sparked my creativity, but I consider it one of the times in my life that I really defined myself. It's a lot easier to know who you are when you write it down and you see it on paper. I suggest everyone write a list of what they believe and to be serious about it. There are some funny sayings in this, but there's more thought-provoking ones.

Anyway, enjoy and feel free to comment and/or add your own:

1. I believe that I'm an AMERICAN. No matter what color I am, where my grandparents were from, or who brought me here makes me otherwise if I was born in the U.S. and my parents are legal citizens.

2. I believe stupid people multiply at a far greater pace than smart people.

3. I believe that no one is smarter than I and I'm not smarter than anyone because you can learn something from EVERYONE.

4. I believe that a beautiful woman has lost all her sex appeal if I can't hold a 5 minute conversation with her.

5. I believe that boy bands are created by Satan just to piss off all straight men.

6. I believe silent protests are stupid because most things get done when people LISTEN and how are they supposed to listen when you don't @&$*! speak???

7. I believe that all comedians are created by God because for a few minutes out of a day, they can make a person forget about their problems and make them happy.

8. I believe in God and Jesus, however, I do not like for churches to tell me how to behave on Sunday just to see them not practice what they preach on Wednesday.

9. I believe I love the Lotto because even though I’ll never win, I'm going to school for free because of it.

10. I believe it's hard to make a list of enlightening thoughts.

11. I believe that men who drug women for sex are cowards and should be castrated.

12. I believe that the same people who smoke and blame it on the Tobacco Industry are the same people who sue you and me for a false neck injury in an accident and ruin our insurance.

13. Going on about smoking....I also believe that people who CHOOSE to smoke know exactly what they're doing because coughing has NEVER been a good thing.

14. I believe that no drug or diet can make you look better than alcohol can.

15. I believe that the Jerry Springer Show is the reason why tornadoes only hit trailers.

16. I believe that no matter how perfect a girl may be, I will never turn my back on my family or friends for her.

17. I believe that the death penalty is wrong because if someone did something that is worthy of death, then they should be forced into 10 hours of hard labor every day for the rest of their life in Siberia.

18. I believe that no superstar could ever be incredibly depressed because no matter what, they could still find someone to sleep with.

19. I believe that a rock star lifestyle is one of the reasons I love music so much.

20. I believe that Alex Rodrigez and Kobe Bryant's phat bank accounts are two reasons why I don't like professional sports that much any more.

21. I believe that college sports are the best sports because people still have the desire to make it big.

22. I believe that Remember the Titans is a wonderful movie that everyone should watch because it has two great messages: 1) Racism is not necessary and 2) Football is the greatest sport on the planet.

23. I believe that people hate not because of past experiences or the way they were raised, but because they are scared of being willing to forgive and forget or are scared of someone's differences.

24. I believe that respect and trust are the two most desirable emotions that I would like to have from people because all relationships (business or personal), friendships, and even family bonds are based on those two things.

25. I believe in the good of all people until I have a reason not to.

26. I believe this list has gotten too serious and I need to be funny again for a moment.

27. I believe that Napster is the best thing ever to happen to the internet regardless of what the midget from Metallica (Lars) says.

28. I believe that fraternities and sororities are good things until they delegate how you act, think, and dress. I am not a cow and I will not act like cattle. Hail!

29. I believe Angelina Jolie has the best lips on the planet.

30. I believe that nice guys do finish last but I also believe that when we have a relationship, it actually means something.

31. I believe that being a single parent is incredibly hard but I also believe that people shouldn't make it harder for themselves by not practicing safe sex.

32. I believe that politics play a role in every aspect of life from the time you are in High School and on.

33. I believe gossip and rumors are wonderful because if someone is spreading false things about me, they are still acknowledging that I'm worth talking about.

34. I believe that even though I have wonderful parents who would do anything for me, I am not spoiled and am grateful for everything I have ever gotten. I also believe that when I become rich, my parents will be paid back beyond their imagination before I ever buy one thing for myself.

35. I believe dreams and hope are the two most important things a person needs to survive.

36. I believe that when I get to 50 on this list, I'll stop.

37. I believe that I bleed red and black.

38. I believe that McDonald's is out to kill me with the grease on those french fries.

39. I believe that JFK and MLK were killed by the government, but I don't think that it will ever be admitted.

40. I believe that women are the most confusing species on the planet and men are so simple that it confuses women. Needless to say, no one knows what the hell the other one is thinking.

41. I believe that Sportscenter is the funniest show on TV.

42. I believe the perfect woman watches Sportscenter, watches college sports, loves old cars, likes beer, and listens to all kinds of music. Oh, and she should be into short, fat guys with no money and big ears :-) P.S. It wouldn't hurt for her to be a model for the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit issue either.

43. I believe that being funny is easy because all you have to do is not take everything so damn seriously.

44. I believe that making it to 50 is going to be harder than I thought.

45. I believe the internet is a good and bad thing. It consumes too many ugly people's time and not enough good-looking people are on it.

46. I believe I'm not as shallow as some of these comments may sound, but if you couldn't tell that already, then you're the same people who say that smoking isn't your choice.

47. I believe the 80s were a great time for music but also a great time for us to learn that synthesizers aren't always a good thing.

48. I believe that too much information is stored on computers and I that scares me.

49. I believe that Y2K was the biggest pile of B.S. the world has ever seen.

50. I believe that I have either enlightened you, made you laugh, or pissed you off.....either way, I made you think.

Be safe everyone!
Anonymous Anonymous said...
Well thank you. I hope our snuggling meant as much to you as it did to me..... IT DID!!!???
~Penny Puppy

Blogger Staisha said...
You know what's sad? (or this could be a complement on your behalf!!) I still have that list on my old email account. I thought it was clever and well thought out...and...well, maybe i'm just a pack rat...either way, i've kept it for all this time!

Blogger Stacy said...
I BELIEVE that "Remember the Titans" is a great movie because I'm in it! :)

I also believe that beer is the best beverage ever invented and that Jojo should win an award for how much he can back me there.

I remember this list from a while ago too, although I'm not a packrat like Staisha, haha!

Thanks for sharing! luv ya!

Blogger Weird Alaska Freak said...
Dude. #40. Sooo true.