Collage 3
The Dawg-gone Blog
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Monday, September 24, 2007
Let me go ahead and start by saying that UGA fans aren’t perfect. We don’t always “rock other peoples’ face off” when opposing teams come into town. We have been known to be unruly at times. But I don’t think we’re one of the worst in college football. And by worst, I don’t necessarily mean “bad.” It’s more like “here’s 10 teams whose fan bases could stand to hang out with Tim Gunn for a weekend.” You know…just to chill out a little and get some more class and style.

So let’s not keep you waiting.


The Ten Worst Fan Bases in College Football:

10. Ohio State – Have they done anything to me specifically? Nope. However, I just don’t like them. I don’t like salads either. Some things just don’t vibe with me like they do other people. I think my real disdain for them began with Maurice Clarett. Reports have been hit or miss, but I have heard that Jim Tressel runs a clean and disciplined program. Such reports have come from faithful OSU fans who are blind to the fact that they celebrate a former coach who kicked a kid from the opposing team’s ass DURING A GAME. I’m not saying they’re all bad people, though. I’m not even angry with them that they win in a league whose commissioner says the SEC is full of a bunch of kids who can’t make Big Ten (11) grades. Whatever, no biggie. I just don’t like them. Never will. I like the band, though. Hence the reason they’re ranked where they are.


The face of "pride."


9. Alabama – Sometime soon, I plan to make a list of the other schools I’d cheer for had I not been a UGA fan. When I make that list, I’ll probably put Alabama very high on it. I respect their tradition, winning ways, and most of the alumni have been great to me. However, since Saban has joined them it’s like the Tide have lost their mind…and their respect. When UGA walked out of BDS Saturday night, they reeked of bourbon from all the drinks thrown onto them from the stands. I know Alabama has this elitist attitude and feel like they should win every game, but come on. You don’t just throw drinks at KIDS who won a game where both teams left it all on the field. You stay classy, Alabama. Enjoy the Independence Bowl this year.


8. West Virginia – Ok, I get the fact that you guys have never really had a team until recently. I totally understand how that much success in such a short time can change people and make them act like they’ve lost their mind. Take a look at lottery winners, “Pac Man” Jones, and Michael Vick. Sometimes success can drive you crazy. However, the burning of couches? Seriously? Any time you do something that Detroit fans would do after a big win, you can consider your actions “not responsible.” Like I said, I love the pure passion they show inside the stadium. But outside, it’s like a scene from Escape from New York. Come on. Love your couches, people.


The more you know.


7. LSU – “Passionate.” I’d describe LSU fans that way. I admire their undying respect for their football team. They have supported the Tigers in a very admirable way. However, the throwing of footballs, sticks, rocks, cups, etc. at our bus when we traveled to play the Bayou Bengals in 2003 will always stay in my mind. It was like that scene out of “The Replacements” where Clifford Franklin is so pumped because he’s seeing his football heroes and then they start pelting him with eggs because he crossed the Scab line. I remember feeling a sense of mutual respect as our bus passed tailgate after tailgate, but as we got closer to the stadium, all you could hear is the pounding of debris on the side of our chartered transportation.


6. Florida – Is there really any need for me to explain this? Gameday for them is like a cookout at a family reunion; not a religious experience like it is for us. Now personally, I’ve never really encountered a horrible Florida fan. But my buddy (and former Battle Hymn soloist) Amos nearly got a horrible scar put on his cheek by some Florida girl wanting to extinguish her cigarette on his face. The key word is “nearly” because his red headed girlfriend (now wife) dotted that UF girl’s eye with a right hook. And, in case you needed further proof after that story, just see the pictures below. Do I really need to say more?


The word? "Manly."




Kevin Federline says: "Go Gators."


5. Auburn – HA! I’ve been waiting for years to see Auburn go through the rough times they deserve. However, the best part is watching the Plaintigeagle fans scramble trying to explain what the heck is actually going on. Auburn has always been a brutal place to travel to, and even though our rivalry with them is more of one of tradition than hate, it’s still a rivalry that has produced some poor sportsmanship. When Auburn beat UGA in 2001, thousands of Dawg fans stood and watched as the Hedges were absolutely destroyed by Tiger players and fans as they picked off branches for souvenirs. The damage stayed for years and I have never forgotten that. I also made sure I remembered in 2002 as I snipped myself a *little* piece of their hedges when we beat them. And when I say little, I mean little. Those things are prickly and ate my arms up. Anyway, Auburn fans blow. It is what it is.


4. South Carolina – Blind loyalty regardless of the circumstances. The difference between USC and Georgia Tech? Georgia Tech won games before the past 5 years. Another difference? USC sold out their games in those losing seasons. Two completely opposite scenarios with completely opposite expected outcomes in regards to attendance. You have to at least give the Cock fans some credit for that. However, that blind loyalty goes hand in hand with utter stupidity. I have had a bad experience every time I’ve been to Columbia. Whether it was ungodly hot, or their fans were ungodly drunk and touchy-feely on our dance team, there was always something bad about that place. Besides, they’re all Cock fans…literally. I only call someone that when I really hate them anyway.


3. Miami – When talking football language, there’s always a “U” in “ghetto.” ESPN’s coverage of the Miami/Texas A&M game was absolutely classic. They talked about the history of the Orange Bowl and then how badly that dump needed to be torn down. The reason I’m bringing that up is because Miami fans (those who DON’T go to the university) are kind of like the Orange Bowl…broke and busted. Let’s all admit it. You can go to a Miami game and should you not die inside the stadium, you might as well be the Running Man outside. Not a safe place. Also, when your mascot wears a chain-link necklace with some “U” bling on it, your priorities are out of place. On top of that, I’ve always heard horrible things about Miami fans, whether they’re beating people up or performing some type of bodily function on an opposing team. Pure trash. Again, it’s all off-campus people, though. The actual Miami campus is really, really nice.


Image speaking for itself taken from EDSBS.


2. USC – You know what pisses me off? Celebration of a championship that you didn’t win. USC fans, much like the rest of us, want to live in a world where the BCS doesn’t exist. That’s all well and good, but they only want to live in that world when it benefits them. Take the 2003 season, for instance, where LSU stomped OU’s ass in the BCS title game only to have the AP vote USC the National Champion after they drubbed Michigan in the Rose Bowl. Don’t get me wrong, USC MIGHT have been the best team that year, but they didn’t win the Championship, much less play in the game. That’s like me saying UGA was the National Champion in 2002 because we were the best team, but because Florida beat us, we didn’t play in the game. Weak. Do me a favor USC fans and remember the good days now, because it ain’t going to be all Hollywood glitz and glamour once Pete Carroll bolts at the end of this year.


Amen.


1. Georgia Tech – As I have proven over, and over, and over, and over again, I hate Georgia Tech. All the way from their stupid guide to how their female gameday dates should act (like they’ve ever had one anyway) to the stories I have told of getting hit with bourbon and bottle rockets. There is no doubt that Georgia Tech fans are the worst in the United States. All teams at all levels included. I’d rather be jumped at a Miami game, set on fire in Morgantown, be hit with better bourbon in Alabama, be some Florida girl’s personal ashtray, get nailed with rocks in Baton Rouge, get harassed by a drunken Cock, take an uppercut from the ghost of Woody Hayes, listen to a Trojan talk on and on about their three-peat, and have pieces of my hair torn out for souvenirs by an Auburn grad than to deal with Tech fans. I know some good Tech people. Heck, I have some in my family, but their utter and absolute disregard for reality just bothers me straight to my core. Look, the world needs nerds. Someone’s gotta keep making those bad-@$$ games I play on Xbox 360, but don’t play football. Don’t even worry about sports. It’s not your thing. Go celebrate long division or something. Stop wasting the rest of the world’s time.


Fighting the good fight.

Well there you have it. Feel free to post your own lists below in the comments section. A new Munson Mix will be posted tomorrow.

Until next time kids.

Be safe.

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6 Comments:
Blogger Ally said...
"I’d rather be jumped at a Miami game, set on fire in Morgantown, be hit with better bourbon in Alabama, be some Florida girl’s personal ashtray, get nailed with rocks in Baton Rouge, get harassed by a drunken Cock, take an uppercut from the ghost of Woody Hayes, listen to a Trojan talk on and on about their three-peat, and have pieces of my hair torn out for souvenirs by an Auburn grad than to deal with Tech fans."

Best...Line...EVER!!
Hysterical post; I was laughing out loud! The stuff you wrote on Yech is priceless.

I wouldn't change your top ten, I'll just add some honorable mentions:

1. Tennessee- Rocky Top. Need I say more?
2. Clemson-Tammy Bowdon has yet to take them to a divisional title, much less the ACC Championship game. But, these people seem to think they're always worthy of the MNC. My apologies to John.
3. Michigan- the APP State beat-down has done wonders for their egos this year, however.
4. Notre Dame- Ugh. Go Huskies! :-)
5. Florida State- never seen fans beat up on their own players and coaches so badly like at Florida State. You can't win it all every year folks!

Blogger Joe said...
CLASSIC POST!!!!

Spot on with everything!

-UT...Rocky Top was kinda cool the first time I heard it..BUT AFTER 547 times....BEFORE GAME TIME...it gets a little old!

Blogger galarza said...
im going to ignore your comments on USC....

my top worst fans?
arizona state
TENNESSEE - can't stand them
florida
ucla

hmmm...west coast schools are just as obnoxious as southern schools. however, i would like to shout out to auburn, as i've never encountered nicer fans ever. at auburn. after usc handed their asses right back to them. super nice people.

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Not sure how UT, ND and Michigan got left off of the list. That being said, I wouldn't remove anybody either. Nice work

Blogger Matt T said...
1. South Carolina was my first road game in Redcoats, and after being cursed and spit at by an 8 year old, its hard to erase that memory.
2. Tech - Its hard to explain how irritating they are. All they do is talk about us, and curse us, that's because they have nothing else. They feed more off our program than their own, and that is sad. and the I'm going to be your boss line is lame and has nothing to do with athletics.

Anonymous HateWVU said...
Here are a couple of local links for your WVU idiots......
http://www.dailymail.com/News/200712030038


How about this one. Nothing like rocking the Pitt team bus and firing up RB McCoy...what was that 38 attempts for 148 yds.
http://www.post-gazette.com/pg/07336/838577-233.stm